Q&A JOKES :
Q: What is a computer virus?
A: A terminal illness!
Q: What is a dentist's favorite animal?
A: A molar bear!
Q: Why was everyone so tired on April 1st?
A: They had just finished a March of 31 days.
Q: Why was the math book sad?
A: Because it had too many problems!
Q: What did the cat say when it fell down the stairs?
A: Me-ow!
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: It left its Windows open!
Q: What gets wetter the more that it dries?
A: A towel!
Q: What do you call two bananas?
A: A pair of slippers!
Q: How do you talk to a giant?
A: Use big words!
Q: Which dinosaur has the best vocabulary?
A: The thesaurus!
Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus!
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck!
Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Between us, something smells!
Q: Why can't you tell a joke to an egg?
A: It might crack up!
Q: What did the buffalo say when his little boy left for school?
A: Bison!
Q: Which hand is it better to write with?
A: Neither, it’s better to write with a pencil!
Q: If a math teacher had four apples in one hand and five apples in the other hand, what would they have altogether?
A: Really big hands!
Q: What did the apple say to the worm?
A: Nothing, apples can't talk!
Q: What do you call a fly without wings?
A: A walk!
Q: Why can’t a hand be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it would be a foot!
Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: "I'll meet you at the corner!"
Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: Because it was two-tired!
Q: What breed of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper?
A: Any breed of dog. Skyscrapers can’t jump!
Q: What kind of key opens a banana?
A: A mon-key!
Q: Why are balloons so expensive?
A: Inflation!
Q: What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?
A: Yellow!
Q: What does a cow call an earthquake?
A: A milkshake!
Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A: Fsh!
Q: What do you call a huge pile of cats?
A: A meow-ntain!
Q: What's the best time to go to the dentist?
A: Tooth-hurty!
Q: Which is faster? Hot or cold?
A: Hot. You can easily catch a cold.
Q: What has more letters than the alphabet?
A: The post office!
Q: Why are spiders so smart?
A: They can find everything on the web!
Q: What can you catch, but never throw?
A: A cold!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A: A dino-snore!
Q: What kind of shoes do spies wear?
A: Sneakers!
Q: Why don't scientists trust atoms?
A: Because they make up everything!
Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole in one!
Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?
A: "Dam!"
Q: What's the best way to communicate with a fish?
A: Drop it a line!
Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A: A bloodhound!
Q: What's black and white and read all over?
A: A newspaper!
Q: Where does fruit go on vacation?
A: Pear-is!
Q: What kind of dog does a magician have?
A: A Labracadabrador!
Q: What do you call a bear with no ears?
A: A “B!”
Q: Why did an old man fall in a well?
A: Because he couldn’t see that well!
Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights?
A: They go to the moo-vies!
Q: What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
A: He puts his PJ-Amazon!
Q: What do you call a belt made of watches?
A: A waist of time!
Q: What did the banana say to the dog?
A: Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.
Q: Waiter, will my pizza be long?
A: No sir, it will be round!
Q: What building in New York has the most stories?
A: The public library!
Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A: Finding half a worm in your apple!
Q: What kind of room doesn’t have doors?
A: A mushroom!
Q: Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because his teacher told him it would be a piece of cake!
Q: What did the family say when they lost 25% of their roof?
A: Oof.
Q: What do you call a sad strawberry?
A: A blueberry!
Q: If a seagull flies over the sea, what flies over the bay?
A: A bagel!
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because the chicken wasn’t born yet.
Q: What goes up and down but does not move?
A: Stairs.
Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?
A: Write on!
Q: Why did the tomato blush?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing!
Q: Where do sailboats go when they're sick?
A: To the dock!
Q: What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries?
A: An investigator!
Q: What is an insect's favorite sport?
A: Cricket!
Q: How do bees get to school?
A: By school buzz!
Q: Why do the French like to eat snails?
A: Because they don't like fast food!
Q: What did one volcano say to the other?
A: I lava you!
Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
A: A pie-thon!
Q: What fish only swims at night?
A: A starfish!
Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A: Because there was a KFC on the other side!
Q: What did Mars say to Saturn?
A: Give me a ring sometime.
Q: When is the moon the heaviest?
A: When it's full!
Q: Why did the picture go to prison?
A: Because it was framed!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To show everyone he wasn't chicken!
Q: Why is a fish easy to weigh?
A: Because it has its own scales!
Q: If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make?
A: Slippers!
Q: Why didn't the sun go to college?
A: Because it already had a million degrees!
Q: What type of songs do the planets sing?
A: Nep-tunes!
Q: What's a golfer's favorite letter?
A: Tee!
Q: What animal is best at hitting a baseball?
A: A bat!
Q: At what sport to waiters do really well?
A: Tennis, because they can serve so well.
Q: What happened when the wheel was invented?
A: It caused a revolution!
Q: How does a skeleton call his friends?
A: On the tele-bone.
A: Your nose.
Q: What goes up but never comes back down?
A: Your age.
Q: How many letters are there in the alphabet?
A: There are 11: three in "the" and eight in "alphabet."
Q: Which question can you never answer "yes" to?
A: "Are you asleep?"
Q: What happens once in a minute, twice in a moment but never in one thousand years?
A: The letter “M”.
Q: Imagine you are in a room with no windows or doors. How will you get out?
A: Stop imagining.
Q: What's something that, the more you take, the more you leave behind?
A: Footsteps.
Q: I’m orange, I wear a green hat and I sound like a parrot. What am I?
A: A carrot.
Q: Ms. Smith has four daughters. Each daughter has a brother. How many kids are there in total?
A: Five, there are four daughters and one son. Each daughter has the same brother.
Q: There’s only one word in the dictionary that’s spelled wrong. What is it?
A: The word “wrong.” It’s the only word that’s spelled W-R-O-N-G.
Q: Sam's parents have three kids. Their names are Huey, Dewey, and _____?
A: Sam!
Q: You’re running a race and at the very end, you pass the person in 2nd place. What place did you finish the race in?
A: You finished in 2nd place.
Q: The English alphabet goes from A to Z but my name goes from Z to A. What am I?
A: A Zebra.
Q: What is yours but mostly used by others?
A: Your name.
Q: Give me a drink, and I will die. Feed me, and I'll get bigger. What am I?
A: A fire.
Q: What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?
A: The letter N.
Q: I’m the father of fruits. What am I?
A: A papa-ya.
Q: Everyone has me but no one can lose me. What am I?
A: A shadow.
Q: What starts with T, ends with T, and has T inside it?
A: A teapot.
Q: A word I know, six letters it contains, remove one letter and 12 remains, what is it?
A: Dozens.
Q: There's a one-story house. Everything in the blue house is blue, the walls are blue, the bathroom is blue, the floor is blue, the kitchen is blue, all of the bedrooms are blue. So, what color are the stairs?
A: There's no stairs, it's a one-story house.
Q: I can fill a room, but I take up no space. What am I?
A: Light.
Q: If I have it, I don’t share it. If I share it, I don’t have it. What is it?
A: A secret.
Q: What month of the year has 28 days?
A: All of them!
Q: What has one eye but can’t see?
A: A needle.
Q: I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
A: Your breath.
Q: I have cities, but no houses. I have forests, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I?
A: A map.
Q: What has a head and a tail but no body?
A: A coin.
Q: It has keys, but no locks. It has space, but no room. You can enter, but can’t go inside. What is it?
A: A keyboard.
Q: What goes away as soon as you talk about it?
A: Silence.
Q: What can run but cannot walk?
A: Water.
Q: What has a mouth but can’t speak?
A: A river.
Q: It’s the only place in the world where today comes before yesterday. Where is it?
A: The dictionary.
Q: I go all around the world, but never leave the corner. What am I?
A: A stamp.
Q: Which word becomes shorter when you add 2 letters to it?
A: The word “short.”
Q: What’s the capital of France?
A: The letter “F.” It's the only capital letter in France.
Q: What kind of cup doesn’t hold water?
A: A cupcake.
Q: What word begins with E and ends with E, but only has one letter?
A: Envelope.
Q: Which is heavier: a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
A: Neither—they both weigh a ton.
Q: What two things can you never eat for breakfast?
A: Lunch and dinner.
Q: What has many rings but no fingers?
A: A telephone.
Q: What appears once in a minute, twice in a moment, but not once in a thousand years?
A: The letter "M."
Q: You cut me, slice me, dice me, and all the while, you cry. What am I?
A: An onion.
Q: I’m always on the dinner table, but you don’t get to eat me. What am I?
A: Plates and silverware.
Q: If you drop a yellow hat in the Red Sea, what does it become?
A: Wet.
Q: What has four fingers and a thumb but isn’t alive?
A: A glove.
Q: What has to be broken before you can use it?
A: An egg.
Q: If you drop me, I’m sure to crack, but smile at me and I’ll smile back. What am I?
A: A mirror.
Q: What has hands and a face, but can’t hold anything or smile?
A: A clock.
Q: You’ll find me in Mercury, Earth, Mars and Jupiter, but not in Venus or Neptune. What am I?
A: The letter “R.”
Q: What breaks when you say it?
A: Silence!
Q: How many peas are there in a pint?
A: There is one 'P' in a 'pint'.
Q: What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A: A Bed.
Q: What is full of holes but can still hold water?
A: A sponge!
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water?
A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle)
Q: Where does success come before work?
A: In the dictionary!
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters?
A: IC (icy).
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and ?
A: David!
Q: What is the center of gravity?
A: The letter V!
Q: If you feed me, I grow, but if you give me water, I die. What am I?
A: Fire.
Q: How do you make the number 7 even without adding, subtracting, multiplying or dividing?
A: Take out the "S."
Q: What is easier to get into than out of?
A: Trouble.
Q: How do you make the number one disappear?
A: Add the letter G and it’s “gone”.
Q: Where does Thursday come after Friday?
A: The dictionary.
Q: Remove my skin and I won’t cry, but you might!
A: An onion.
Q: Where are the lakes always empty, the mountains always flat and the rivers always still?
A: A map.
Q: A man looks at a painting and says, “Brothers and sisters I have none, but that man’s father is my father’s son.” Who is in the painting?
A: His son.
Q: I am a sea animal with eight arms and a soft body. I squirt ink to protect myself. Who am I?
A: Octopus.
Q: I am a big cat with black stripes and sharp claws. I love to hunt in the jungle. Who am I?
A: Tiger.
Q: I am a slow-moving animal with a hard shell on my back. I love to munch on leafy greens. Who am I?
A: Turtle.
Q: What kind of tree can you carry in your hand?
A: A palm.
Q: What has many keys but can’t open a single lock?
A: A piano.
Q: What do you get when you cross a zebra with a donkey?
A: A zonkey!
Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A: Because 7, 8 (ate), 9!
Q: How many seconds are in a year?
A: Twelve — January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd…
Q: What is made of water, but if you put it into water it vanishes?
A: An ice cube.
Q: There are 3 apples in a basket and you take away 2. How many apples do you have now?
A: You have 2 apples. You took away 2 apples and left 1 in the basket.
Q: What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?
A: The future.
Q: You have a basket that’s one foot in diameter and one foot deep. How many apples can you fit in the empty basket?
A: Only one, because then it’s not empty anymore.
Q: I can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? What am I?
A: A barber.
Q: 81 x 9 = 801. What do you need to do to make this equation true?
A: Turn it upside down: 108 = 6 x 18.
Q: What 3 numbers give the same result when multiplied and added together?
A: 1, 2, and 3 (1 + 2 + 3 = 6 and 1 x 2 x 3 = 6).
Q: What runs but cannot walk, has a mouth but no teeth and has a bed but cannot sleep?
A: A river.
Q: What bank never has any money?
A: river bank.
Q: If an electric train is traveling 60 MPH and going against the wind, which way will the train's smoke drift?
A: There is no smoke from an electric train.
Q: What do you find at the end of a rainbow?
A: The letter W.
Q: What has a neck but no head and arms but no hands?
A: A shirt.
Q: I fall but I never get hurt.
A: Snow.
Q: What kind of ship has two mates but no captain?
A: relationship.
Q: What is as big as a hippo but weighs nothing at all?
A: hippo's shadow.
Q: Two fathers and two sons went fishing. They only caught 3 fish, but they caught one fish each. How is this possible?
A: It was a grandfather, a father, and a grandson/son. (Both the grandfather and father are fathers and both the father and grandson are sons).
Q: Mr. Red and Ms. Red live in the red house, Mr. Purple and Ms. Purple live in the purple house. Who lives in the white house?
A: The President!
Q: Everyone has it, but no one can lose it. What is it?
A: A shadow.
Q: I have four eyes, yet I can’t see a thing. What am I?
A: MISSISSIPPI.
Q: What falls a lot but doesn’t get hurt at all?
A: Rain.
Q: I am easy to lift, but hard to throw. What am I?
A: A feather.
Q: What four-letter word can be written the same forward and backward, as well as upside down?
A: Noon.
Q: The more of this there is, the less you can see. What is it?
A: Darkness.
Q: After an electric train crashed, every single person died. Who lived?
A: The couples.
Q: What is the fastest way to double your money?
A: Place it in front of the mirror.
Q: Which word in the dictionary is always spelled incorrectly?
A: Incorrectly.
Q: What two keys cannot open any doors?
A: Monkey and donkey.
Q: Who wears shoes while sleeping?
A: A horse.
Q: People buy me to eat, but I cannot be eaten. What am I?
A: A plate.
Q: I have no life, but I can die. What am I?
A: A battery.
Q: You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again you don’t see a single person on the boat. Why not?
A: They're all married.
Q: Amy threw the ball as hard as she could and it came back to her, without anything or anyone touching it. How?
A: She threw the ball upward into the air.
Q: If you threw a black stone into the Red Sea, what would it become?
A: Wet.
Q: A woman called her horse from the opposite side of a river. The horse crossed the river without getting wet, and without using a boat or bridge. How?
A: The river was frozen.
Q: Is it possible for a woman to go 10 days without sleeping?
A: Yes, she will sleep at night.
Q: Three men jump into the water, but only two come out with wet hair. Why?
A: The third man was bald.
Q: You walk into a room that has a match, a candle and a fireplace. Which should you light first?
A: The match.
Q: What it called when a dinosaur makes a soccer goal?
A: A dino-score.
Q: My life is measured in hours and I serve you by expiring. I’m quick when I’m thin and slow when I’m fat. The wind is my enemy. What am I?
A: A candle.
Q: I add 5 to 9 and get 2. The answer is correct, so what am I?
A: A clock. When it is 9 a.m., adding 5 hours would make it 2 p.m.
Q: What are eight 8s that add up to 1,000?
A: 8 + 8 + 8 + 88 + 888 = 1,000.
Q: How many times can you subtract 10 from 25?
A: Once. After you subtract 10 from 25 the first time, it becomes 15.
Q: A woman fell from a 30-foot ladder without getting hurt. How?
A: She was standing on the bottom rung.
Q: When the water comes down, I go up. What am I?
A: An umbrella.
Q: What is white, but smells like blue paint?
A: White paint.
Q: What has a neck, but no head?
A: A bottle.
Q: When my father was 30 years old, I was 9 years old. Now, I am 40 years old, so what will be his age now?
A: 61.
Q: When Rebecca was 8 years old, her little brother, Bob, was half his age. If Rebecca is 20 years old today, how old is Bob?
A: 16.
Q: What comes before 11 and after 15?
A: 10 and 16.
Q: Rachel goes to the supermarket and buys 10 tomatoes. Unfortunately, on the way back home, all but 9 get ruined. How many tomatoes are left in a good condition?
A: 9.
Q: What can you put between 4 and 5 so that the result is more than 4, but less than 5?
A: A decimal.
A: Because it had too many problems!
Q: What did the cat say when it fell down the stairs?
A: Me-ow!
Q: Why was the computer cold?
A: It left its Windows open!
Q: What gets wetter the more that it dries?
A: A towel!
Q: What do you call two bananas?
A: A pair of slippers!
Q: How do you talk to a giant?
A: Use big words!
Q: Which dinosaur has the best vocabulary?
A: The thesaurus!
Q: Why did the computer go to the doctor?
A: Because it had a virus!
Q: What has four wheels and flies?
A: A garbage truck!
Q: What did one eye say to the other eye?
A: Between us, something smells!
Q: Why can't you tell a joke to an egg?
A: It might crack up!
Q: What did the buffalo say when his little boy left for school?
A: Bison!
Q: Which hand is it better to write with?
A: Neither, it’s better to write with a pencil!
Q: If a math teacher had four apples in one hand and five apples in the other hand, what would they have altogether?
A: Really big hands!
Q: What did the apple say to the worm?
A: Nothing, apples can't talk!
Q: What do you call a fly without wings?
A: A walk!
Q: Why can’t a hand be 12 inches long?
A: Because then it would be a foot!
Q: What did one wall say to the other wall?
A: "I'll meet you at the corner!"
Q: Why did the bicycle fall over?
A: Because it was two-tired!
Q: What breed of dog can jump higher than a skyscraper?
A: Any breed of dog. Skyscrapers can’t jump!
Q: What did the 0 say to the 8?
A: Nice belt!
Q: Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
A: Because she wanted to go to high school.
Q: Where do pencils come from?
A: Pennsylvania!
Q: What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
A: Its shadow.
A: Nice belt!
Q: Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?
A: Because she wanted to go to high school.
Q: Where do pencils come from?
A: Pennsylvania!
Q: What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
A: Its shadow.
Q: What kind of key opens a banana?
A: A mon-key!
Q: Why are balloons so expensive?
A: Inflation!
Q: What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?
A: Yellow!
Q: What does a cow call an earthquake?
A: A milkshake!
Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A: Fsh!
Q: What do you call a huge pile of cats?
A: A meow-ntain!
Q: What's the best time to go to the dentist?
A: Tooth-hurty!
Q: Which is faster? Hot or cold?
A: Hot. You can easily catch a cold.
Q: What has more letters than the alphabet?
A: The post office!
Q: Why are spiders so smart?
A: They can find everything on the web!
Q: What can you catch, but never throw?
A: A cold!
Q: What do you call a dinosaur that is sleeping?
A: A dino-snore!
Q: What kind of shoes do spies wear?
A: Sneakers!
Q: Why don't scientists trust atoms?
A: Because they make up everything!
Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
A: In case he got a hole in one!
Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall?
A: "Dam!"
Q: What's the best way to communicate with a fish?
A: Drop it a line!
Q: What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A: A bloodhound!
Q: What's black and white and read all over?
A: A newspaper!
Q: Where does fruit go on vacation?
A: Pear-is!
Q: What kind of dog does a magician have?
A: A Labracadabrador!
Q: What do you call a bear with no ears?
A: A “B!”
Q: Why did an old man fall in a well?
A: Because he couldn’t see that well!
Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights?
A: They go to the moo-vies!
Q: What does Jeff Bezos do before he goes to sleep?
A: He puts his PJ-Amazon!
Q: What do you call a belt made of watches?
A: A waist of time!
Q: What did the banana say to the dog?
A: Nothing. Bananas can’t talk.
Q: Waiter, will my pizza be long?
A: No sir, it will be round!
Q: What building in New York has the most stories?
A: The public library!
Q: What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
A: Finding half a worm in your apple!
Q: What kind of room doesn’t have doors?
A: A mushroom!
Q: Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because his teacher told him it would be a piece of cake!
Q: What did the family say when they lost 25% of their roof?
A: Oof.
Q: What do you call a sad strawberry?
A: A blueberry!
Q: If a seagull flies over the sea, what flies over the bay?
A: A bagel!
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Because the chicken wasn’t born yet.
Q: What goes up and down but does not move?
A: Stairs.
Q: What did the paper say to the pencil?
A: Write on!
Q: Why did the tomato blush?
A: Because it saw the salad dressing!
Q: Where do sailboats go when they're sick?
A: To the dock!
Q: What do you call an alligator who solves mysteries?
A: An investigator!
Q: What do you call a boy named Lee that no one talks to?
A: Lonely.
Q: What part of the car is the laziest?
A: The wheels, because they are always tired!
Q: Why was the belt arrested?
A: Because it held up some pants!
Q: What makes the calendar seem so popular?
A: Because it has a lot of dates!
Q: Patient: Doctor, sometimes I feel like I'm invisible.
A: Doctor: Who said that?
Q: What is green and has yellow wheels?
A: Grass…..I lied about the wheels!
Q: Why do you go to bed every night?
A: Because the bed won't come to you!
Q: What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant?
A: Lots of memory!
Q: What did the judge say to the dentist?
A: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
Q: Why did the king go to the dentist?
A: To get his teeth crowned!
Q: What kind of hair do oceans have?
A: Wavy!
Q: What does a baby computer call his father?
A: Data!
Q: Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
A: To reach the high notes.
Q: When do astronauts eat?
A: At launch time!
A: Lonely.
Q: What part of the car is the laziest?
A: The wheels, because they are always tired!
Q: Why was the belt arrested?
A: Because it held up some pants!
Q: What makes the calendar seem so popular?
A: Because it has a lot of dates!
Q: Patient: Doctor, sometimes I feel like I'm invisible.
A: Doctor: Who said that?
Q: What is green and has yellow wheels?
A: Grass…..I lied about the wheels!
Q: Why do you go to bed every night?
A: Because the bed won't come to you!
Q: What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant?
A: Lots of memory!
Q: What did the judge say to the dentist?
A: Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
Q: Why did the king go to the dentist?
A: To get his teeth crowned!
Q: What kind of hair do oceans have?
A: Wavy!
Q: What does a baby computer call his father?
A: Data!
Q: Why did the music teacher need a ladder?
A: To reach the high notes.
Q: When do astronauts eat?
A: At launch time!
Q: How do football players stay cool during the game?
A: They stand close to the fans?
A: They stand close to the fans?
Q: What is an insect's favorite sport?
A: Cricket!
Q: How do bees get to school?
A: By school buzz!
Q: Why do the French like to eat snails?
A: Because they don't like fast food!
Q: What did one volcano say to the other?
A: I lava you!
Q: What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie?
A: A pie-thon!
Q: What fish only swims at night?
A: A starfish!
Q: Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
A: Because there was a KFC on the other side!
Q: What did Mars say to Saturn?
A: Give me a ring sometime.
Q: When is the moon the heaviest?
A: When it's full!
Q: Why did the picture go to prison?
A: Because it was framed!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To show everyone he wasn't chicken!
Q: Why is a fish easy to weigh?
A: Because it has its own scales!
Q: If a crocodile makes shoes, what does a banana make?
A: Slippers!
Q: Why didn't the sun go to college?
A: Because it already had a million degrees!
Q: What type of songs do the planets sing?
A: Nep-tunes!
Q: What's a golfer's favorite letter?
A: Tee!
Q: What animal is best at hitting a baseball?
A: A bat!
Q: At what sport to waiters do really well?
A: Tennis, because they can serve so well.
Q: What happened when the wheel was invented?
A: It caused a revolution!
Q: How does a skeleton call his friends?
A: On the tele-bone.
RIDDLES :
Q: I sometimes run, but I cannot walk. What am I?A: Your nose.
Q: What goes up but never comes back down?
A: Your age.
Q: How many letters are there in the alphabet?
A: There are 11: three in "the" and eight in "alphabet."
Q: Which question can you never answer "yes" to?
A: "Are you asleep?"
Q: I’m tall when I’m young, and I’m short when I’m old. What am I?
A: A candle.
A: A candle.
Q: What happens once in a minute, twice in a moment but never in one thousand years?
A: The letter “M”.
Q: Imagine you are in a room with no windows or doors. How will you get out?
A: Stop imagining.
Q: What's something that, the more you take, the more you leave behind?
A: Footsteps.
Q: I’m orange, I wear a green hat and I sound like a parrot. What am I?
A: A carrot.
Q: Ms. Smith has four daughters. Each daughter has a brother. How many kids are there in total?
A: Five, there are four daughters and one son. Each daughter has the same brother.
Q: There’s only one word in the dictionary that’s spelled wrong. What is it?
A: The word “wrong.” It’s the only word that’s spelled W-R-O-N-G.
Q: Sam's parents have three kids. Their names are Huey, Dewey, and _____?
A: Sam!
Q: You’re running a race and at the very end, you pass the person in 2nd place. What place did you finish the race in?
A: You finished in 2nd place.
Q: The English alphabet goes from A to Z but my name goes from Z to A. What am I?
A: A Zebra.
Q: What is yours but mostly used by others?
A: Your name.
Q: Give me a drink, and I will die. Feed me, and I'll get bigger. What am I?
A: A fire.
Q: What is in seasons, seconds, centuries and minutes but not in decades, years or days?
A: The letter N.
Q: I’m the father of fruits. What am I?
A: A papa-ya.
Q: Everyone has me but no one can lose me. What am I?
A: A shadow.
Q: What starts with T, ends with T, and has T inside it?
A: A teapot.
Q: A word I know, six letters it contains, remove one letter and 12 remains, what is it?
A: Dozens.
Q: There's a one-story house. Everything in the blue house is blue, the walls are blue, the bathroom is blue, the floor is blue, the kitchen is blue, all of the bedrooms are blue. So, what color are the stairs?
A: There's no stairs, it's a one-story house.
Q: I can fill a room, but I take up no space. What am I?
A: Light.
Q: If I have it, I don’t share it. If I share it, I don’t have it. What is it?
A: A secret.
Q: What month of the year has 28 days?
A: All of them!
Q: What has one eye but can’t see?
A: A needle.
Q: I’m light as a feather, yet the strongest person can’t hold me for five minutes. What am I?
A: Your breath.
Q: I have cities, but no houses. I have forests, but no trees. I have water, but no fish. What am I?
A: A map.
Q: What has a head and a tail but no body?
A: A coin.
Q: It has keys, but no locks. It has space, but no room. You can enter, but can’t go inside. What is it?
A: A keyboard.
Q: What goes away as soon as you talk about it?
A: Silence.
Q: What can run but cannot walk?
A: Water.
Q: What has a mouth but can’t speak?
A: A river.
Q: It’s the only place in the world where today comes before yesterday. Where is it?
A: The dictionary.
Q: I go all around the world, but never leave the corner. What am I?
A: A stamp.
Q: Which word becomes shorter when you add 2 letters to it?
A: The word “short.”
Q: What’s the capital of France?
A: The letter “F.” It's the only capital letter in France.
Q: What kind of cup doesn’t hold water?
A: A cupcake.
Q: What word begins with E and ends with E, but only has one letter?
A: Envelope.
Q: What goes in a birdbath but never gets wet?
A: The bird's shadow.
Q: I am an odd number. Take away a letter and I become even. What number am I?
A: Seven.
A: The bird's shadow.
Q: I am an odd number. Take away a letter and I become even. What number am I?
A: Seven.
Q: Which is heavier: a ton of bricks or a ton of feathers?
A: Neither—they both weigh a ton.
Q: What two things can you never eat for breakfast?
A: Lunch and dinner.
A: A telephone.
Q: What appears once in a minute, twice in a moment, but not once in a thousand years?
A: The letter "M."
Q: You cut me, slice me, dice me, and all the while, you cry. What am I?
A: An onion.
Q: I’m always on the dinner table, but you don’t get to eat me. What am I?
A: Plates and silverware.
Q: If you drop a yellow hat in the Red Sea, what does it become?
A: Wet.
Q: What has four fingers and a thumb but isn’t alive?
A: A glove.
Q: What has to be broken before you can use it?
A: An egg.
Q: If you drop me, I’m sure to crack, but smile at me and I’ll smile back. What am I?
A: A mirror.
Q: What has hands and a face, but can’t hold anything or smile?
A: A clock.
Q: You’ll find me in Mercury, Earth, Mars and Jupiter, but not in Venus or Neptune. What am I?
A: The letter “R.”
Q: What breaks when you say it?
A: Silence!
Q: How many peas are there in a pint?
A: There is one 'P' in a 'pint'.
Q: What has one head, one foot and four legs?
A: A Bed.
Q: Does your shirt have holes in it?
A: No, then how did you put it on?
Q: What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?
A: A penny!
Q: I am a colorful bird with a curved beak. I love to imitate human speech. Who am I?
A: Parrot.
Q: What starts with a P and ends with an E and has a million letters in it?
A: Post Office!
A: No, then how did you put it on?
Q: What English word has three consecutive double letters?
A: Bookkeeper.
A: Bookkeeper.
Q: What has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?
A: A penny!
Q: I am a colorful bird with a curved beak. I love to imitate human speech. Who am I?
A: Parrot.
A: Post Office!
Q: What is full of holes but can still hold water?
A: A sponge!
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water?
A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle)
Q: Where does success come before work?
A: In the dictionary!
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters?
A: IC (icy).
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and ?
A: David!
Q: What is the center of gravity?
A: The letter V!
Q: If you feed me, I grow, but if you give me water, I die. What am I?
A: Fire.
Q: How do you make the number 7 even without adding, subtracting, multiplying or dividing?
A: Take out the "S."
Q: What goes up, but never comes down?
A: Your age!
Q: What gets bigger and bigger as you take more away from it?
A: A hole!
Q: What has legs but cannot walk?
A: A chair!
A: Your age!
Q: What gets bigger and bigger as you take more away from it?
A: A hole!
Q: What has legs but cannot walk?
A: A chair!
Q: What is easier to get into than out of?
A: Trouble.
Q: How do you make the number one disappear?
A: Add the letter G and it’s “gone”.
Q: Where does Thursday come after Friday?
A: The dictionary.
Q: Remove my skin and I won’t cry, but you might!
A: An onion.
Q: Where are the lakes always empty, the mountains always flat and the rivers always still?
A: A map.
Q: A man looks at a painting and says, “Brothers and sisters I have none, but that man’s father is my father’s son.” Who is in the painting?
A: His son.
Q: I am a sea animal with eight arms and a soft body. I squirt ink to protect myself. Who am I?
A: Octopus.
Q: I am a big cat with black stripes and sharp claws. I love to hunt in the jungle. Who am I?
A: Tiger.
Q: I am a slow-moving animal with a hard shell on my back. I love to munch on leafy greens. Who am I?
A: Turtle.
Q: What kind of tree can you carry in your hand?
A: A palm.
Q: What has many keys but can’t open a single lock?
A: A piano.
Q: What do you get when you cross a zebra with a donkey?
A: A zonkey!
Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7?
A: Because 7, 8 (ate), 9!
Q: How many seconds are in a year?
A: Twelve — January 2nd, February 2nd, March 2nd…
Q: What is made of water, but if you put it into water it vanishes?
A: An ice cube.
Q: There are 3 apples in a basket and you take away 2. How many apples do you have now?
A: You have 2 apples. You took away 2 apples and left 1 in the basket.
Q: What is always in front of you but can’t be seen?
A: The future.
Q: You have a basket that’s one foot in diameter and one foot deep. How many apples can you fit in the empty basket?
A: Only one, because then it’s not empty anymore.
Q: I can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard? What am I?
A: A barber.
Q: 81 x 9 = 801. What do you need to do to make this equation true?
A: Turn it upside down: 108 = 6 x 18.
Q: What 3 numbers give the same result when multiplied and added together?
A: 1, 2, and 3 (1 + 2 + 3 = 6 and 1 x 2 x 3 = 6).
Q: What runs but cannot walk, has a mouth but no teeth and has a bed but cannot sleep?
A: A river.
Q: What bank never has any money?
A: river bank.
Q: If an electric train is traveling 60 MPH and going against the wind, which way will the train's smoke drift?
A: There is no smoke from an electric train.
Q: What do you find at the end of a rainbow?
A: The letter W.
Q: What has a neck but no head and arms but no hands?
A: A shirt.
Q: I fall but I never get hurt.
A: Snow.
Q: What kind of ship has two mates but no captain?
A: relationship.
Q: What is as big as a hippo but weighs nothing at all?
A: hippo's shadow.
Q: Two fathers and two sons went fishing. They only caught 3 fish, but they caught one fish each. How is this possible?
A: It was a grandfather, a father, and a grandson/son. (Both the grandfather and father are fathers and both the father and grandson are sons).
Q: Mr. Red and Ms. Red live in the red house, Mr. Purple and Ms. Purple live in the purple house. Who lives in the white house?
A: The President!
Q: Everyone has it, but no one can lose it. What is it?
A: A shadow.
Q: I have four eyes, yet I can’t see a thing. What am I?
A: MISSISSIPPI.
Q: What falls a lot but doesn’t get hurt at all?
A: Rain.
Q: I am easy to lift, but hard to throw. What am I?
A: A feather.
Q: What four-letter word can be written the same forward and backward, as well as upside down?
A: Noon.
Q: The more of this there is, the less you can see. What is it?
A: Darkness.
Q: After an electric train crashed, every single person died. Who lived?
A: The couples.
Q: What is the fastest way to double your money?
A: Place it in front of the mirror.
Q: Which word in the dictionary is always spelled incorrectly?
A: Incorrectly.
Q: What two keys cannot open any doors?
A: Monkey and donkey.
Q: Who wears shoes while sleeping?
A: A horse.
Q: People buy me to eat, but I cannot be eaten. What am I?
A: A plate.
Q: I have no life, but I can die. What am I?
A: A battery.
Q: You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again you don’t see a single person on the boat. Why not?
A: They're all married.
Q: Amy threw the ball as hard as she could and it came back to her, without anything or anyone touching it. How?
A: She threw the ball upward into the air.
Q: If you threw a black stone into the Red Sea, what would it become?
A: Wet.
Q: A woman called her horse from the opposite side of a river. The horse crossed the river without getting wet, and without using a boat or bridge. How?
A: The river was frozen.
Q: Is it possible for a woman to go 10 days without sleeping?
A: Yes, she will sleep at night.
Q: Three men jump into the water, but only two come out with wet hair. Why?
A: The third man was bald.
Q: You walk into a room that has a match, a candle and a fireplace. Which should you light first?
A: The match.
Q: What it called when a dinosaur makes a soccer goal?
A: A dino-score.
Q: My life is measured in hours and I serve you by expiring. I’m quick when I’m thin and slow when I’m fat. The wind is my enemy. What am I?
A: A candle.
Q: I add 5 to 9 and get 2. The answer is correct, so what am I?
A: A clock. When it is 9 a.m., adding 5 hours would make it 2 p.m.
Q: What are eight 8s that add up to 1,000?
A: 8 + 8 + 8 + 88 + 888 = 1,000.
Q: How many times can you subtract 10 from 25?
A: Once. After you subtract 10 from 25 the first time, it becomes 15.
Q: A woman fell from a 30-foot ladder without getting hurt. How?
A: She was standing on the bottom rung.
Q: When the water comes down, I go up. What am I?
A: An umbrella.
Q: What is white, but smells like blue paint?
A: White paint.
Q: What has a neck, but no head?
A: A bottle.
Q: When my father was 30 years old, I was 9 years old. Now, I am 40 years old, so what will be his age now?
A: 61.
Q: When Rebecca was 8 years old, her little brother, Bob, was half his age. If Rebecca is 20 years old today, how old is Bob?
A: 16.
Q: What comes before 11 and after 15?
A: 10 and 16.
Q: Rachel goes to the supermarket and buys 10 tomatoes. Unfortunately, on the way back home, all but 9 get ruined. How many tomatoes are left in a good condition?
A: 9.
Q: What can you put between 4 and 5 so that the result is more than 4, but less than 5?
A: A decimal.
TONGUE TWISTERS :
I saw a kitten eating chicken in the kitchen.
How can a clam cram in a clean cream can?
I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream.
Can you can a can as a canner can can a can?
Near an ear, a nearer ear, a nearly eerie ear.
She sells seashells by the seashore.
Susie works in a shoeshine shop. Where she shines she sits, and where she sits she shines.
I wish to wash my Irish wristwatch.
I have got a date at a quarter to eight; I’ll see you at the gate, so don’t be late.
You know New York, you need New York, you know you need unique New York.
If a dog chews shoes, whose shoes does he choose?
Eddie edited it.
Willie’s really weary.
I saw Susie sitting in a shoeshine shop.
I thought I thought of thinking of thanking you.
Tom threw Tim three thumbtacks.
He threw three free throws.
A big black bear sat on a big black rug.
Red lorry, yellow lorry.
Thin sticks, thick bricks.
So, this is the sushi chef.
Six sticky skeletons.
Which witch is which?
Stupid superstition.
Six Czech cricket critics.
Green glass globes glow greenly.
A proper copper coffee pot.
She sees cheese.
Eleven benevolent elephants.
We surely shall see the sun shine soon.
Snap crackle pop.
Flash message.
Four fine fresh fish for you.
Wayne went to wales to watch walruses.
A flea and a fly flew up in a flue.
Red Buick, blue Buick.
Toy boat. Toy boat. Toy boat.
Six sticky skeletons.
Tie twine to three tree twigs.
Sheena leads, Sheila needs.
If a dog chews shoes, whose shoes does he choose?
No need to light a night-light on a light night like tonight.
A synonym for cinnamon is a cinnamon synonym.
Selfish shellfish.
Roberta ran rings around the Roman ruins.
He threw three free throws.
A happy hippo hopped and hiccupped.
Toy boat. Toy boat. Toy boat.
Thirty-three thousand feathers on a thrushes throat.
Selfish shellfish.
Roberta ran rings around the Roman ruins.
He threw three free throws.
A happy hippo hopped and hiccupped.
Toy boat. Toy boat. Toy boat.
The great Greek grape growers grow great Greek grapes.
Linda-Lou Lambert loves lemon lollipop lip gloss.
Near a ear, a nearer ear, a nearly eerie ear.
Top chopstick shops stock top chopsticks.
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